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canyonwalkerSan Diego SKO travelog #7
SAN Airport · Thu, 12 Feb 2026. 5pm.
I remarked yesterday at SKO that I was feeling increasingly mentally checked out of my job and only half listening. After last night's club snub my mental checkout was complete. But then it got worse. By late, late evening my attitude had shifted from "I just don't care anymore" to, "I do care, and I'm pissed." I went into Day 4 of SKO today with a bad attitude.
The thing is though, I'm more of a lover than a fighter. SKO today, with a smaller audience and a less formal format, quickly went into a roleplaying exercise. I asserted that I would play the customer. It allowed me to be a bit cranky and call it teamwork. 😂 Our team did well. Everyone contributed, everyone learned. We didn't win the prize for best team— there was a $100 cash prize per person in addition to fleeting recognition— but fuck it, I so totally didn't care. (Plus a $100 bonus isn't going to motivate me for shit when they're shorting me $50,000.)
Following our roleplay (we went first) I drifted off into not paying attention, sitting toward the back of the room, nose-down in my phone most of the time. At lunch I made amiable conversation, including business conversation, with a number of colleagues. It surprised even me to see how my strength at role play exercises extends to pretending like my heart is still in this job and I don't actually have a massive chip on my shoulder, when discussing account strategy with coworkers and/or my new boss. It's like, OMG, they totally don't know. 😨
After lunch I dropped out again. Partly it was because I didn't care and was happy to browse my phone instead of paying attention to anyway. And partly it was that I had the sleepies from Death By Powerpoint. My mind was wandering even from reading news and Buzzfeed listicles on my phone, and I almost fell asleep in my chair at least twice. And still nobody noticed. ...Though that part I chalk up less to my roleplaying ability and more to the fact that probably everybody who'd migrated to the back half of the room was struggling in the afternoon on Day 4. 🤣
I left "early" at 4:30. The schedule was running behind and there was one seminar left when we should have been wrapping up. The last seminar wasn't relevant to me— really nothing here is relevant to me anymore— so I quietly left for the airport. I said goodbye to several coworkers at the back of the room. I don't think they knew that we might have been saying goodbye for the last time in person ever. I wasn't even thinking of it in those terms at the time... and I'm not sure I care anyway. 🙁
SAN Airport · Thu, 12 Feb 2026. 5pm.
I remarked yesterday at SKO that I was feeling increasingly mentally checked out of my job and only half listening. After last night's club snub my mental checkout was complete. But then it got worse. By late, late evening my attitude had shifted from "I just don't care anymore" to, "I do care, and I'm pissed." I went into Day 4 of SKO today with a bad attitude.
The thing is though, I'm more of a lover than a fighter. SKO today, with a smaller audience and a less formal format, quickly went into a roleplaying exercise. I asserted that I would play the customer. It allowed me to be a bit cranky and call it teamwork. 😂 Our team did well. Everyone contributed, everyone learned. We didn't win the prize for best team— there was a $100 cash prize per person in addition to fleeting recognition— but fuck it, I so totally didn't care. (Plus a $100 bonus isn't going to motivate me for shit when they're shorting me $50,000.)
Following our roleplay (we went first) I drifted off into not paying attention, sitting toward the back of the room, nose-down in my phone most of the time. At lunch I made amiable conversation, including business conversation, with a number of colleagues. It surprised even me to see how my strength at role play exercises extends to pretending like my heart is still in this job and I don't actually have a massive chip on my shoulder, when discussing account strategy with coworkers and/or my new boss. It's like, OMG, they totally don't know. 😨
After lunch I dropped out again. Partly it was because I didn't care and was happy to browse my phone instead of paying attention to anyway. And partly it was that I had the sleepies from Death By Powerpoint. My mind was wandering even from reading news and Buzzfeed listicles on my phone, and I almost fell asleep in my chair at least twice. And still nobody noticed. ...Though that part I chalk up less to my roleplaying ability and more to the fact that probably everybody who'd migrated to the back half of the room was struggling in the afternoon on Day 4. 🤣
I left "early" at 4:30. The schedule was running behind and there was one seminar left when we should have been wrapping up. The last seminar wasn't relevant to me— really nothing here is relevant to me anymore— so I quietly left for the airport. I said goodbye to several coworkers at the back of the room. I don't think they knew that we might have been saying goodbye for the last time in person ever. I wasn't even thinking of it in those terms at the time... and I'm not sure I care anyway. 🙁
